The Heart of God | Luke 15

INTRODUCTION

Happy Father’s Day. We thank God for godly fathers. God bless you.

Some have loving fathers. But for some, Father’s Day is not simple. Some remember a father who was absent or who was harsh. There are some fathers who regret because they know they did not always parent well. some mothers carried the family burden alone; some children still carry wounds from home.

Today, before we speak about families, we must first look at the heart of God. Because only when we see God’s heart clearly can our homes begin to heal.

The Heart of God

Main Theme: The God who welcomes us with fatherly mercy and mother-like compassion calls us to reflect His heart in our homes.

1. God is Compassionate

Luke 15

We call this the parable of the lost son, prodigal son.

Context:

Luke 14:35-15:2

³⁵“Whoever has ears to hear, let them hear.” ¹Now the tax collectors and sinners were all gathering around to hear Jesus. (Who had ears to hear? The tax collectors and sinners had ears to hear.) ²But the Pharisees and the teachers of the law muttered, “This man welcomes sinners and eats with them.”

Who has a problem with Jesus? Not tax collectors and sinners, they don’t have a problem with Jesus. But the scripture teachers had a problem with Jesus. Sometimes God’s people have a problem understanding Jesus.

Why do they have a problem with Jesus? Because they think they know God, and they look at Jesus, they don’t match. Jesus says, “The best way is, let me tell you stories, then you’ll know what God looks like.” So Jesus tells them these stories to correct their view of God.

We have 3 stories:

• So the first parable about a shepherd who risked 99 sheep in the wilderness to go looking after that one sheep. That’s dangerous, risky, you won’t do that, but that’s God.

• A woman who looks after that very precious coin till she finds it, and celebrates.

• The of a father and 2 sons. Actually, this story is about the father.

What kind of father is it who lets his son take his money and go away? Then he blows it up. That’s why we call him the prodigal, right? Because he’s reckless, he wastes the money.

And then when the son, after he’s had enough, comes back home, he makes up a speech, prepares, “I’ll tell him I’ve sinned against God and against you, Father. Keep me in the as a slave. After all, I wasted my property, I can’t be your son.” And he comes back, what happens?

Luke 15:20

So he got up and went to his father.

“But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him. (Greek: He fell on his neck and kissed him.)

The son came home broken. And what does a father say to the son? Nothing

Luke 15:22-24

²²“But the father said to his servants, ‘Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. ²³Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let’s have a feast and celebrate. ²⁴For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’

In the story, the father says nothing to this son because all he wants to say, he does it.

The word “prodigal,” which means extraordinary, something that causes amazement. The son was prodigal in recklessly wasting the father’s share. Then, this is a story of a prodigal father, a father who lavishes his grace to an undeserving son. That’s God. This is the story of the compassionate father, God the compassionate father. That’s the God Jesus came to reveal. That’s the God on the cross when he said, “Father, forgive them….” God is the compassionate father.

And the story is not over. There’s a elder son. These two sons represent the two groups of people with Jesus: Tax collectors, sinners the first son, and the Pharisees and the teachers of the law, the elder son. But the elder son comes and tells him, “Father, you are not fair!”

Luke 15:28-30

²⁸“The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him. ²⁹But he answered his father, ‘Look! All these years I’ve been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. ³⁰But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!’ (All this is going on outside the gate.)

³¹“‘My son,’ the father said, ‘you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. ³²But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’”

Some of us are like the younger son—ashamed, broken, far away. Some of us are like the older son—near the house, but far from the father’s heart. But the Father comes out to both. God forgives. God is a compassionate father.

In Exodus 34, God is introducing himself to Moses.

Exodus 34:6

⁶And he passed in front of Moses, proclaiming, “The Lord, the Lord, (Adonai, Adonai) the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness, ⁷maintaining love to thousands, and forgiving wickedness, rebellion and sin. …..

A compassionate and gracious God. The Hebrew word for compassion is related to deep, womb-like tenderness. God is not physically male or female as we are; God is Spirit. He reveals Himself as Father, yet Scripture also uses mother-like images to show the depth of His compassion.

Isaiah 49:15

Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you!

God is our Father, but His fatherly heart contains a tenderness deeper than the best mother’s love.

Application: If there is anyone here, if you’ve not experienced and you have not let your life given your life to this compassionate Father, today you can do that.

Transition: If this is the heart of God, how should this shape our homes?

2. Parenting with Compassion

Ephesians 6:4

Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.

Colossians 3:21

Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.

A. Parenting begins with confession

God has the created the family as the key social unit. That is why we the family is under attack. Every family have to deal with differences and difficulties because we are fallen people. Think about lifelong significance of what God has called you to do. Parenting is demanding for the 25-30 years where we have an active role in the life of our children.

Good and godly parenting always begins with confession. It begins with a humble admission that everything my children need, I cannot do it on my own. As parents, we are sinners raising sinners. Everything our children need, we also need. They need grace; we need grace. They need correction; we need correction. My child need patience; we need patience.

Every parent and every child struggles with self-rule and self-sufficiency; only Christ can change the heart. So parenting begins with confession that I can do this only by God’s grace.

B. Parenting is stewardship, not ownership

There are really only two models of parenting: Ownership parenting and Stewardship parenting. The owner parent says, “These children belong to me, and it is my right and responsibility to get from my children what I want from them, and to produce in them what I want in them. The Stewardship parents says, “These children do not belong to me. They belong to the Lord. And my calling is to make the purpose of God fulfil in the lives of my children. Parenting is stewardship, not ownership

C. Parenting must grow with the child

Stage	Mode
Until 12	Control
Teen	Coaching – Deep Parenting
Adult	Influence
Married	Release

Control – Childhood

Small children need protection, boundaries, and clear instruction. Control here is a good thing. They do not know the rules of life, their brain is still forming. They need to know, “Don’t run to the street, be home before it is dark.” They do not always see the danger.

Deep Parenting – Teen Years

Teenagers need conversation, values, consequences, responsibility and wisdom. So more parenting control in the first half, the deep parenting less control and by that time they become teens. In the teen years, parents must move from mere control to coaching. Teenagers need conversations that help them understand values, consequences, responsibility, wisdom, and faith.

Influence – Adult Children

Adult children cannot be controlled; they must be influenced through relationship, prayer, listening, and love.

Release – Married Children

Once children are married, parents must bless without controlling. Release them. Convey your love as parents and availability. Your role changes to a loving friend, who has some wisdom that you can come to. I want to be there for you for any talk anytime.

ILLUSTRATION

When a child is small, the parent holds the steering wheel. When the child becomes a teenager, the parent slowly teaches the child how to drive. When the child becomes an adult, the parent cannot sit in the driver’s seat anymore. You may sit beside them for a season, and later you may only speak when invited. Parenting must move from control to coaching to influence.

D. Parenting is a ministry

Your child’s weaknesses are God-given moments of ministry. We can respond to a child’s weakness into moments of anger.

If your ever see the sin, weakness, and failure of your children, it’s never an accident. It’s never an interruption. It’s always grace. God loves those children. He’s put them in a family of faith. God will again and again reveal their need, their weakness, their sin to you so you can be a tool of His rescue and redemption. It’s grace.

3. Healing with Compassion

So far we have seen that God is compassionate. We have also seen that parenting must be shaped by the compassion of God. But we must now speak honestly. Every family needs compassion because every family is made up of fallen people.

There are no perfect fathers. There are no perfect mothers. Neither there are perfect children and perfect homes. In every family, there are moments of love and joy. But there are also moments of misunderstanding, anger, silence, wounds, resentment, regret, and grief.

• Some parents are carrying regret. Fathers wish they had been more present. Some mothers wish they had been more patient.
• Some children are carrying wounds. Some children wish their parents had listened more. Adult children still remember words spoken years ago.
• Some parents feel hurt by children who have become distant.
• Some children feel hurt by parents who were too strict, too absent, too controlling, or not exemplary in their walk.

So what do we do with family wounds?

The answer is to bring our wounds, our failures, our regrets, and our relationships under the compassion of God.

Colossians 3:12–14

Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.

In the morning, before we come out of the house, we choose what to wear. We look at our clothes and decide what is suitable for the day. But Paul says there is something deeper God’s people must wear. Put on compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience mixed with love. The home begins to heal when someone in the home begins to reflect the nature of God.

Now let me first speak to parents:

Some parents need to go home today and say, “I am sorry.” Be honest and specific.

• “Sorry, I was too harsh.”
• I disciplined you in anger.”
• I compared you with others.”
• I controlled you when I should have guided you.
• I cared more about reputation than your heart.
• I spoke about God, but sometimes I did not reflect the heart of God.

Parents, confession does not weaken godly authority. Confession builds trust. A humble parent does not lose respect.

There are some parents who feel hurt by their children, abandoned, not cared for, provided for, disrespected by your children. Some parents are carrying the pain of children who are far away emotionally. They are alive, but distant. They may be in the same city, but far in relationship. They may call rarely. They may visit only when necessary. So we need healing with compassion in our families.

Now let me speak to children, teenagers, and adult children:

• Some of you have been hurt.
• Some of you honour your parents outwardly, but inwardly there is pain.
• Yet, some of you had parents who were too strict or parents who were absent or parents who provided everything materially, but did not know how to show affection.
• Some of you had parents who corrected you but did not listen to you, parents who served God publicly but struggled to reflect God’s heart at home.
• Some of you carry words that were spoken many years ago or some of you were compared with siblings, relatives, or other children. Yet, some of you were made to feel that you were never enough.

The Bible says, “Honour your father and mother.” But honour does not mean denying your hurt. Honour does not mean pretending that wrong things were right. But honour does mean that, by the grace of God, I will not allow bitterness to rule my heart.

Pastor, how can I Forgive my family member who has so deeply wounded me?

Stages for forgiveness:

a. Identify – Name the hurt.

Accept that you have been hurt and you feel it that way. You judged me, you dismissed me, you were rude to me.

b. Express – Tell the truth.

It was wrong. It was not right. Say, “Lord, what happened was wrong. Those words hurt me. That absence affected me. That comparison wounded me.

c. Search – Your own heart.

Look at your part. Did I have a part to play in this. Ask, “Lord, is there anything I must confess? Have I responded with dishonour, pride, bitterness, distance, revenge, or rebellion?”

d. Grieve – Before the Lord.

Some of us have never grieved what we did not receive. Bring that grief to God. Jesus is not offended by your tears. He is well acquainted with grief. Grief brought to God can become a pathway to healing.

e. Release Revenge.

Say, “Lord, I give this to You. I release my right to keep punishing them in my heart. I entrust justice to You. I ask You to heal me.” This may not happen in one moment. Forgiveness can be a journey. But the journey must begin somewhere.

f. Pray.

Ask God for help. It is not until we are the end of ourselves that he begins. Go with the pain, sorrow, helplessness and say that I need help from you Lord. Pour out your heart to the Lord. God cares for you.

g. Set Boundaries.

Set boundaries where needed.

What if the relationship with an adult child or a parent does not reconcile, there is estrangement? Don’t give up. Keep reminding them that you love them and you would like to talk on a regular basis. The prodigal father was always looking. Do not give up hope. Keep the door open with love, prayer, humility, and wisdom. Reconciliation may be slow, but compassion keeps the heart ready.

Dear people of God: The father in Luke 15 did not approve the far country. But he kept his heart open for the son’s return. And when the son returned, the father did not begin with a lecture. He began with compassion.

ILLUSTRATION

In many homes, when someone has not yet returned, the family keeps a porch light on. The light says, ‘Someone is waiting.’ Luke 15 shows us the Father with the porch light on. He is not approving the far country, but He is ready to receive the son who comes home.

Some children also need to build a bridge. Maybe your parents do not know how to begin. Maybe they are not good with words. Healing requires courage from both sides.

Malachi 4:6

He will turn the hearts of the parents to their children, and the hearts of the children to their parents….

CONCLUSION

Today, on this Father’s Day, we look first at the heart of God. He is the compassionate Father. In Christ, God came all the way to us, carrying our sin, wounds, anger, regret, and family brokenness on the cross. All our relationship failures have been borne by Jesus on the cross. So parents, confess where you have failed. Children, bring your wounds to Christ and forgive without becoming prisoners of bitterness. Families, build bridges with truth, humility, and love. By the Holy Spirit, may our hearts turn to God and to one another, reflecting His healing compassion at home today. Jesus did not only die for our sin; He rose again to give us new life. Therefore, no family wound is beyond His redeeming grace, and no heart is beyond His transforming power.

So today, let us ask:

Parents, is there something you need to confess?

Children, is there bitterness you need to bring to Christ?

Adult children, is there a bridge you need to build?

Families, is there a conversation that must begin?

The home begins to heal when someone in the home begins to reflect the heart of God.