Dealing With Criticism | Nehemiah 4:1-5:7

 INTRODUCTION

Criticism is something that we all face from time-to-time in life. Sometimes we unknowingly get into the mode of criticizing others, yet at other times we become the victim of being criticized. Has anyone sitting here never ever criticized anyone? No. Anyone here never been criticized? No. We all have been criticized at some time or the other. It is not easy to be criticized. Criticism if not handled well; tears a person apart, discourages us, and demoralizes us.

ILLUSTRATION

A monk joined a monastery and took a vow of silence. He could speak only two words after every 10 years. After the first 10 years his superior called him in and asked, “Do you have anything to say?” The monk replied, “Food bad.” After another 10 years the monk again had opportunity to voice his thoughts. He said, “Hard bed.” Another 10 years went by and again he was called in before his superior. When asked if he had anything to say, he responded, “I quit.” The supervisor said, “It doesn’t surprise me a bit. You’ve done nothing for 30 years but criticize and complain ever since you got here.”

Dealing With Criticism

HF: This morning I want to speak to you about:

• What the Scripture says about criticism?
• When we criticize or talk about others what are the measures we can use scripturally?
• How to deal with criticism?

Nehemiah 4

Nehemiah was burdened to go and rebuild the broken walls of Jerusalem. So when Nehemiah finally gets to Jerusalem from Persia, he envisions the people to come together to build the walls. Everyone left behind their jobs and businesses, and  was involved in building the walls and all of a sudden they face a lot of criticism.

Nehemiah 2:19

But when Sanballat the Horonite, Tobiah the Ammonite official and Geshem the Arab heard about it, they mocked and ridiculed us. “What is this you are doing?” they asked. “Are you rebelling against the king?”

Now Sanballat was the ruler over Samaria. Samaria was the capital of the Northern Kingdom of Israel. It fell first to the Assyrians. Now as Sanballat knows that the Jews are rebuilding the other capital Jerusalem, he criticizes them. So how does it affect Sanballat? He knows that the Jews are getting stronger, he will not have control over Jerusalem, and what if they come and take control over his territory?

Nehemiah 4:1-3

¹When Sanballat heard that we were rebuilding the wall, he became angry and was greatly incensed. He ridiculed the Jews, ²and in the presence of his associates and the army of Samaria, he said, “What are those feeble Jews doing? Will they restore their wall? When will they offer sacrifices? Will these jew finish in a day? Can they bring the stones back to life from those heaps of rubble—burned as they are?” ³Tobiah the Ammonite, who was at his side, said, “What they are building—even a fox climbing up on it would break down their wall of stones!”

Here Nehemiah and his people faced severe criticism. Whenever you face criticism, you need to take it through some filters before you respond. Here is the first filter:

Questions To Ask When You Are Criticized:

1. What Is The Target Of The Criticism?

What are they criticizing? Is it a personal criticism against you or is it a criticism against the mission for which God has called you?

If you face criticism against you in your work place, figure out whether the criticism is personally directed at you or your Christian ethics. For example: You may be a stumbling block for someone else’s promotion and that person might get against you and criticize you. That is a personal criticism. Then there are people who criticize you for holding on to your scriptural ethics. Maybe they want you to participate in wrong and you cannot be a part of it. Your family may criticize you for your faith in Jesus Christ. Such criticism is directed against your faith, this is against your godly mission.

In Nehemiah’s case it was external critics. Nehemiah knew it is God’s mission and the criticism is against it. So he knows he needs to overcome this and go on. Therefore, he never gives in to their strategies.

Nehemiah 6:1-4

When word came to Sanballat, Tobiah, Geshem the Arab and the rest of our enemies that I had rebuilt the wall and not a gap was left in it—though up to that time I had not set the doors in the gates— ²Sanballat and Geshem sent me this message: “Come, let us meet together in one of the villages on the plain of Ono.” But they were scheming to harm me; ³so I sent messengers to them with this reply: “I am carrying on a great project and cannot go down. Why should the work stop while I leave it and go down to you?” ⁴Four times they sent me the same message, and each time I gave them the same answer.

Nehemiah was in a mission and the mission was given by God. The mission was criticized by the enemy. Now, God’s mission today is fulfilled through the church. We have no mission of our own, we have God’s mission and it will be challenged and criticized by the enemy. God’s mission is to transform people with the word of God, make them a disciple, connect them to the body of Christ, in our case in the local church here and enable them to have a fellowship with God which brings transformation in their lives. When we do that as a church, each of us make a difference in the world. The goal of the mission is to transform people and transform community with the gospel of Jesus Christ. Now who will oppose that? The devil will oppose that because he does not want people to be transformed by the Truth.

Whenever You Do God’s Work, You Will Face Criticism.

If you are facing criticism for your faith, your mission in Christ Jesus, don’t stop the good work that God is doing through you.

How Does The Enemy Discourage Us? Criticize. Distract. Disrupt.

External Criticism can lead to internal discouragement.

Nehemiah 4:10-12

This is the method of the enemy. Criticism, distraction, and disruption. When you do God’s work you are bound to be criticized. Don’t give in when you are criticized for your mission.

If you don’t want any criticism do this: Don’t talk, don’t do anything. No criticism.

Here, one a large group is building the walls, others are standing by the sides and critiquing the builders. Remember, the moment you start building, that is the moment you also start battling. That means that Satan opposes what God does. God is in the rebuilding business but Satan is in the tearing down business. If you are doing the work of God, you will face opposition.

The enemy wants to discourage us from fulfilling God’s mission, so consider the target of the criticism.

2. Consider The Source Of The Criticism

Who is the criticizer? Are they the people you should listen to or are they people you should not listen to? Is the criticizing in your best interest or in your bad interest? Is it constructive criticism or is it destructive criticism? To discern this we need wisdom.

We see that in Nehemiah. In Nehemiah when it was external criticism, he shut them off. Then there was internal criticism. They were the poor oppressed by the rich and Nehemiah does listen to that. He confronts the problem in a very direct way.

Nehemiah 5:1-7

¹Now the men and their wives raised a great outcry against their fellow Jews. ²Some were saying, “We and our sons and daughters are numerous; in order for us to eat and stay alive, we must get grain.” ³Others were saying, “We are mortgaging our fields, our vineyards and our homes to get grain during the famine.” ⁴Still others were saying, “We have had to borrow money to pay the king’s tax on our fields and vineyards. ⁵Although we are of the same flesh and blood as our fellow Jews and though our children are as good as theirs, yet we have to subject our sons and daughters to slavery. Some of our daughters have already been enslaved, but we are powerless, because our fields and our vineyards belong to others.”

See the situation:

Rich are giving no gain to the poor.

Poor mortgaged their fields to get grain.

Borrowed money to pay the tax.

Children of the poor are enslaved by the rich.

See how Nehemiah deals it head on:

Nehemiah 5:6-7

⁶When I heard their outcry and these charges, I was very angry. ⁷I pondered them in my mind and then accused the nobles and officials. I told them, “You are charging your own people interest!” So I called together a large meeting to deal with them.

If there is any kind of criticism, it is wise to consider the source. Here, Nehemiah knew that the criticism was very genuine and he took action on it.

When you are criticized, find the source of the criticism. Who is it that is criticizing you? Filter out these three categories of people I am going to speak about now. These three categories of people are in our work place, they are in our homes, and they are in the church too. Some of you work with these people. Some of you are married to these people. Many of you go to church with these people. All of you fit into one of these categories.

a. The Wise People

Identify whether the criticism is coming from a wise person. It does not mean that what the wise are saying is always right, but you got to listen to them. Wise people are the ones who over time yield their lives and way of thinking to God’s word. They are well informed of the scripture. They are teachable themselves, they are open and humble. The wise people respond to correction. They learn from their mistakes. Wise people when they criticize you, it is a good thing, not a bad thing.

Ecclesiastes 7:5 NLT

Better to be criticized by a wise person than to be praised by a fool.

Listen to wise criticism. Good criticism is needed to keep us in check. Do you know who is my biggest critique? Mrs. Glory Shine and then my children. I ask Glory about all things, somethings she encourages and some things she critiques. Then I have a select group of friends with whom I discuss things. I take those criticisms very seriously. That is what keeps me in check. I value their comments and it is for the good interest of me. I identify them.

You need to discern that when people speak to you. Try to learn sometimes from your critics if they have my best interest in my mind. When someone is critiquing you, question yourself, “Are they trying to help me or hurt me?”

I have come out of painful situations by listening to wise people. Then there are times I have caused myself pain by not listening to wise people. These are people we need to listen to.

This is how the wise criticize. If you want to practice constructive criticism here is how it has to be.

Scriptural Standards for Constructive Criticism

Criticism Should Be Grounded In Love.

Proverbs 27:6

The wounds from a friend can be trusted….

Ephesians 4:15

…speaking the truth in love…

Godly criticism is true and loving and must come from a humble and caring heart that wises for the best of the other person. Godly criticism will never be bitter, insulting or cold-hearted.

2 Timothy 2:24-25

²⁴And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful. ²⁵Opponents must be gently instructed, in the hope that God will grant them repentance leading them to a knowledge of the truth,

1 Corinthians 13:4-7

⁴Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Criticism Must Be Grounded In The Truth Of God’s Word.

Godly criticism is concerned to be critical only of what the scripture is critical of.

2 Timothy 3:16-17

¹⁶All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, ¹⁷so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.

In other words, the inspired Word of God leads Christians to analyze everyday situations critically.

When You Criticize Others, You Will Be Judged In The Same Measure

Matthew 7:1-2

 ¹“Do not judge, or you too will be judged. ²For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.

MSG “Don’t pick on people, jump on their failures, criticize their faults— unless, of course, you want the same treatment. That critical spirit has a way of boomeranging.

Therefore, as a disciple of Jesus, we can criticize. Only the wise who align their living based on God’s word must criticize but it should be rooted in love, scriptural ethics and with a knowledge that you will be judged by God in the same measure.

ILLUSTRATION

Charles Spurgeon and Joseph Parker both had churches in London in the 19th century. On one occasion, Parker commented on the poor condition of children admitted to Spurgeon’s orphanage. It was reported to Spurgeon however, that Parker had criticized the orphanage itself. Spurgeon blasted Parker the next week from the pulpit. The attack was printed in the newspapers and became the talk of the town. People flocked to Parker’s church the next Sunday to hear his rebuttal. “I understand Dr. Spurgeon is not in his pulpit today, and this is the Sunday they use to take an offering for the orphanage. I suggest we take a love offering here instead.”

The crowd was delighted. The ushers had to empty the collection plates three times. Later that week there was a knock at parker’s study. It was Spurgeon. “You know Parker, you have practiced grace on me

Coming back, identify the source of the criticism. If it is from a wise person, listen to him/her.

b. Fools

Proverbs 14:7

Stay away from a fool, for you will not find knowledge on their lips.

Proverbs 23:9

Do not speak to fools, for they will scorn your prudent words.

Proverbs 26:4

Do not answer a fool according to his folly, or you yourself will be just like him.

ILLUSTRATION

Two taxidermists stopped before a window where an owl was on display. Immediately they criticized the way the owl was mounted. They noted that the eyes were not natural, nor the wings proportionate to its head, and its feathers were not neatly arranged, and its feet needed improvement. When they had finished their criticisms, the owl turned its head and flew away.

There are two kinds of fools.

Ignorant fools. They are not informed. They just talk based on what they feel or hear without verifying the fact. Fools talk before they really draw conclusions on the subject. When someone tells them the fact they understand the situation and stop criticizing. You can correct an ignorant fool and they get close to a wise person. So talk to an ignorant fool.

Obstinate fool. Obstinate means stubbornly refusing to change one’s opinion. They do not want to listen to anybody’s views. They are stubborn on their views. Fools never become wise by reading the word of God. They are not open to correction and they are always right in what they say. If someone does not listen to them, they get into this criticism mode. Keep away from obstinate fools. You cannot correct them.

c. Evil People

Proverbs 4:16-17

Evil people are restless unless they’re making trouble; They can’t get a good night’s sleep unless they’ve made life miserable for somebody. Perversity is their food and drink, violence their drug of choice.

Perversity means a deliberate desire to behave in an unreasonable way. They are sinful people, people with evil intent. They are out to get you. Evil people are out to hurt you. They are out to undermine the work of God. Basically, they do not want to destroy the church or the people, but they do not realize what they are doing. But they have been hurt so badly, their ego is so much that they just throw out venom on others. They feel very right in causing division.

So how do you deal with a person who is evil in their intent and wants to always hurl dirt upon you or someone else. You go into protection mode or the safe mode.

Titus 3:10-11

¹⁰Warn a divisive person once, and then warn them a second time. After that, have nothing to do with them. ¹¹You may be sure that such people are warped and sinful; they are self-condemned.

Divisive means tending to cause disagreement or hostility between people.

These are the trash talkers and they are the wall breakers. You can see them by the looks in their face, nothing pleases them, nothing meets their standards, and they actually like to go and make trouble in the lives of other people. So you are going to face these people out there. Critics are resentful of your success. They don’t want you to do well, because if you do well, it will make them look bad.

Critics are always there. Critics are always together. They engage in groups, they feed off each other. You have heard, “Birds of a feather flock together.” So critical people find each other and they can get together and be critical. The problem is after a while they turn on each other too.

3. When You Are Criticized, Take It To The Lord In Prayer

Nehemiah heard the criticism, the first thing he did was he took it to the Lord in prayer.

Nehemiah 4:4-5

⁴Hear us, our God, for we are despised. Turn their insults back on their own heads. Give them over as plunder in a land of captivity. ⁵Do not cover up their guilt or blot out their sins from your sight, for they have thrown insults in the face of the builders.

Nehemiah 4:9

But we payed to our God…

So what do you do when you are criticized? What do you do when you are attacked? Take it to the Lord in prayer.

Moses was criticized for leading the Israelites.

Exodus 17:1-4

¹The whole Israelite community set out from the Desert of Sin, traveling from place to place as the Lord commanded. They camped at Rephidim, but there was no water for the people to drink. ²So they quarreled with Moses and said, “Give us water to drink.” Moses replied, “Why do you quarrel with me? Why do you put the Lord to the test?” ³But the people were thirsty for water there, and they grumbled against Moses. They said, “Why did you bring us up out of Egypt to make us and our children and livestock die of thirst?” ⁴Then Moses cried out to the Lord, “What am I to do with these people? They are almost ready to stone me.” He called on God and he prayed about it.

When there was a threatening letter sent to King Hezekiah what did he do?

1 Kings 19:14

Hezekiah received the letter from the messengers and read it. Then he went up to the temple of the Lord and spread it out before the Lord. He laid it on the ground and prayed to God in the temple.

The best way to handle criticism is to get on your knees and seek the face of God in His Word and prayer. So when trouble comes your way, call out to God.

1 Peter 5:7

Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

Be careful with two things: Criticism and Praise. Pass these both on to Jesus. Criticism can deflate you, so you pass it on to Jesus. Praise can inflate you, so you pass it onto Jesus.

Nehemiah could see the fear in the eyes of the people because of criticism. He says to them:

Nehemiah 4:14

Don’t be afraid of them. Remember the Lord, who is great and awesome….

“When times get hard, remember Jesus. When people don’t listen, remember Jesus. When tears come, remember Jesus. When disappointment is your bed partner, remember Jesus. When fear pitches his tent in your front yard. When death looms, when anger sings, when shame weighs heavily. Remember Jesus.” Max Lucado

Lucado, Max. Fear Not. Tennessee: Thomas Nelson Inc., 2014

Prayer changes our focus.

4. Don’t Give Up Because Of Criticism

Critique only wins if you give up. The devil wins when you give up. Don’t give up because of criticism. Do not give up because someone is criticizing you. So don’t give up on your marriage. Don’t give up on your ministry. Never give up because someone is talking something about you.

Nehemiah prayed and he continued his work. Pray and Act. He never gave up.

Nehemiah 4:9

But we prayed to our God and posted a guard day and night to meet this threat.

Nehemiah prayed but he was also prepared and reacted practically. The people on the wall prayed and they also were practical.

Nehemiah 4:13

Therefore I stationed some of the people behind the lowest points of the wall at the exposed places, posting them by families, with their swords, spears and bows.

Nehemiah 4:16-18

¹⁶From that day on, half of my men did the work, while the other half were equipped with spears, shields, bows and armor. The officers posted themselves behind all the people of Judah ¹⁷who were building the wall. Those who carried materials did their work with one hand and held a weapon in the other, ¹⁸and each of the builders wore his sword at his side as he worked. But the man who sounded the trumpet stayed with me.

He sets up a system to deal with criticism and negativity.

ILLUSTRATION

Billy Graham, over the decades, has been subject to the most intense criticism a man can face. Some claim he has violated the gospel of Jesus Christ by associating with ministers and laymen who deny the authority of the Bible and the deity of Christ. And there are those who attack him from the other side and say that he has neglected social concerns as he’s put the stress on personal salvation. Some attacked him for using the mass media and questioned his right to use Madison Avenue techniques. Some criticized him for going to Russia 20-something years ago. Even President Reagan publicly declared him as being used by the Soviet authorities.

Billy Graham could spend many a sleepless night if he took all these criticisms too seriously. God has used him. Billy Graham never quit. Thank God for a Billy Graham who has endeavored to do the very best he can with the life God has given him. Are you as faithful? Or are you afraid to accomplish anything for God for fear of criticism? No human being has the right to destroy you.

CONCLUSION

Are you facing a lot of criticism today? Do people accuse you, isolate you and talk against you? First of all, see if there is something that you really need to change. See if the criticism is from wise believers in your good interest. Maybe there is something to learn from it, be open. Are you facing a criticism against your godly mission in your family or work or ministry? Take all your criticism to God and make a decision to continue your good work in the Lord. Don’t quit. God will give you strength and enable you to complete the work he has started in you. Amen.

“If my life is fruitless, it doesn’t matter who praises me, and if my life is fruitful, it doesn’t matter who criticizes me.” – John Bunyan